This is not a bug, there is a difference between a serverconnect action step in a flow and executing the load of a serverconnect component.
The serverconnect action step is handled by the flow and will wait for it to finish, the result is also available in the output.
The options you choose is a general trigger that calls a method on a component in your page. It doesn't have control over the component and doesn't wait for its events to trigger.
If the data changes each time you should probably not be using any caching. The caching happens per URL including querystring parameters. When you use the extra reload prop on the load method it will clear the cache.
I think the reason that not both do reload is probably related to the other problem that one of the loads is canceled due 2 calls directly after each other.